149 -- [Audio, Locked to Sara Ringwalt]

[illuminatings]

Hey, Sara.

How are you? Do you want me to come over? I'll bring some home cooked food, and try to find things around here that could make it feel more like America to you?

Let me know.

Comments

[Locked]

[tenbillionyears.livejournal.com]

...I'm okay.

Am I really here? It seems too good to be true...

I'm--I don't know--I'm okay, just as long as no one touches me--

Why are we here?

[Locked]

[soul-on-light.livejournal.com]

Yes, you are. You're safe now.

Mm, I can try to put in a request so that no one touches you without your permission, Sara.

We're here to help this fight against the Seven Demon Kings, and to bring stability to the Digital World. Sounds kinda out there, but that's what we've been sent here to do.

[Locked]

[tenbillionyears.livejournal.com]

Fight...? ...I don't want to fight. I just want to go--



...I-I don't want to kill anymore. I already... ...Killed someone. ...I don't want to kill. Please.

[Locked]

[soul-on-light.livejournal.com]

Ssh... You won't have to kill anyone, Sara. Leave that stuff to me.

[Locked]

[tenbillionyears.livejournal.com]

Killing is terrible--how can you deal with that? Feeling someone's life slip through your fingers... Knowing that because of you, they'll never breathe again, never talk again...

How can you deal with that...?

[Locked]

[soul-on-light.livejournal.com]

There is that, but I meant the fighting portion. You've earned a nice, long rest, and I want to try my best to give you that rest, okay?

[Locked]

[tenbillionyears.livejournal.com]

I didn't earn anything. I don't know how...you can even think that. The men used me, and I killed one of them. I killed someone. And I am filled with filth that I can't rub away. There's no way...no way I can look Dad in the eyes when I go home.

I almost...miss the desert. Being completely alone like that...you face yourself. That was the first time I realized...that I'm not Sara Ringwalt from Iowa anymore. I'm Sara Ringwalt from Heliud.

So...so please...don't treat me so kindly. I don't want that. I don't want to fight...but neither do the children of Heliud. If they have to fight when they are tired and scared, then so do I.

[Locked]

[soul-on-light.livejournal.com]

Listen...

I've done things I'm not proud of -- fighting people I didn't want to fight, and do things I didn't want to do, but had to do them anyway. I believe that as long as there's a will, there's a way, and if your will's strong enough, it'll surpass anything.

Mm... I can imagine. It was like that when I was doing stuff by myself when I lived alone.

But... I'll respect your wishes. If you want to fight, then I'll help you get stronger. If not, then I'll protect you.

[Locked]

[tenbillionyears.livejournal.com]

Okay. Hel...help me.

...Um. I can use a pistol. Or...wait--how do we fight here?

[Locked]

[soul-on-light.livejournal.com]

I could try to get you a gun, or see if anything similar to it is around here.

And we can fight either with our fists, legs, or with something called Digi-Soul. The stronger your partner, the stronger the Digi-Soul is.

[Locked]

[tenbillionyears.livejournal.com]

...Kamemon.

He...shouldn't fight. He's so tiny.

I'll fight. I...a gun. I can use a gun. I don't...know how to pump a shotgun, but I...

[Locked]

[soul-on-light.livejournal.com]

I'd offer to show you how to use it, but I'm not that well-versed in gun mechanisms. I'm more suited to a dagger or my bare fists to do the fighting for me.

But I'll also try to find someone that can teach you how to use a firearm -- would you like someone female?

[Locked]

[tenbillionyears.livejournal.com]

...Female. I don't want to look at a man.

[Locked]

[soul-on-light.livejournal.com]

Alright. I'll find a female gun instructor for you.

Anything else?

[Locked]

[tenbillionyears.livejournal.com]

...Can you make me forget? Like...I can wake up a completely different person?

[Locked]

[soul-on-light.livejournal.com]

No, I can't make you forget, but I can help you work through the things you've gone through.

[Locked]

[tenbillionyears.livejournal.com]

It doesn't go away. It never goes away.



...I'm sorry.

[Locked]

[soul-on-light.livejournal.com]

I know it won't, but it's better with someone else.

And...you don't have to apologize, Sara. You had to do what you had to do. No one's gonna fault you for that.

[Locked]

[tenbillionyears.livejournal.com]

...Um...

Thank you. For being n-nice.

[Locked]

[soul-on-light.livejournal.com]

You're welcome.

Now, why don't I come over to the hospital and bring you some stuff? How does that sound?

[Locked]

[tenbillionyears.livejournal.com]

You don't have to if you don't want to. I'm okay...

[Locked]

[soul-on-light.livejournal.com]

Nah, I'm okay. I'll do it.

[Locked]

[tenbillionyears.livejournal.com]